Battling with me and myself

That day after returning from Kasara, a nice weekend at my sister’s place I thought I was totally refreshed. But I was wrong. Maybe I silenced my inner demons for a while when my 'positive me’ was activated.

After struggling hard with my inner storm I settled down to give a deeper thought to myself. I wanted to know why those negative thoughts came in my mind as soon as I entered in my house. I had spent a nice weekend far away from my home. Constantly surrounded with positivity; spending time with my little, innocent nieces while I lay down under the clear blue sky. Away from concrete jungle, shrill sounds of horns, here in Kasara I was soaking myself in the natural beauty. The small village Kasara is blessed with greenery, countless natural fountains and fresh green thick hills. I tried to store as much fresh memories I could. I laughed, I played, I rolled on bare green grassland; I inhaled fresh air and I explored the jungle beauties by visiting nearby farms, fountains and dams. All this while my stay at Kasara not a single worry bothered me or any negative thought did not dare to touch me.

Dark clouds hovered around me

Then why all of a sudden the dark clouds hovered around my head when I was being a 'hopeful me'?

My inner voice said

“Its because your future that concerns me.” The inner voice said.

My other half reminded me we all have one life and we should live at the fullest.

My negative me said, “Until you don’t take your present seriously, you won’t enjoy the peaceful future.”

My hopeful me said, “Constant worries are good for nothing.”

“If you don’t remind yourself your goals, you won’t take them seriously and you’ll develop a laid-back attitude.” My demons snapped me in response of my ‘positive me’.

My positive angel tapped me

“But that doesn't mean you need to be on your toes all the time. You can be positively focused while you patiently try to achieve your goals. Let the time take its course.” Again my ‘vibrant me’ assured me. 

“No, do as I say.” My ‘authoritative me’ pushed me.

“Don’t listen to her. Do what your heart says.” The cheery voice said.

This time I was irritated with this me versus myself fight.

Me versus Myself fight

I shook my head as if I wanted to shoo away those terrible thoughts that were weakening my inner strength.

I took a deep breath and I got up from where I was seated. I closed my eyes and stood in front of the mirror. I opened my eyes and saw my inner me was laughing at me when I had that frustrated expression on my face.

I closed my eyes again, took a deep breath. When I opened my eyes my creases on forehead were relaxed now. It’s because in my mind I assured myself I will work on the things better while I cajoled my heart that I will take matters from the bottom of my heart.

I fed my demon avatar with worries, frustration, and gave enough of shit to shut them enough. On the other hand, I fed my positive hippie with hopes, positivity and other good things.

This time I again fought with myself to win over me silencing my demons and letting my positive angels flutter in my mind!

While my positive angels flutter in my mind!

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.  

This post has been a WOW Post

My Intern Theory

Image source - Youtube.com

It’s been more than 7 years when I passed my graduation. Times flies so fast but I still remember the struggling days I had bagging my first job. Even though since childhood I had been passionate about mass media and dreamt of completing graduation in mass media, I ended up Arts degree. Now when I was out of colourful life of collage I wasn't sure where am I going to go with my Arts degree.

At home, everyone told to search for a job. One day my sister came to me telling that so and so interview is on and I should try my hand at it. With no professional experience in hand, I was a bundle of nerves when I went to the interview. To my surprise, I was quickly interviewed and selected on that very same day. But that wasn't the thing that relived me from the worries I had but I was much relived when I learnt that it was only girls department. So my first intern-ship started on a positive note where I was surrounded with only girls. From supervisor, quality analyst to my team members everywhere girls were appointed. Being studied in a girls school, I was more comfortable working at that place.

My job’s nature was making calls to customers who hadn’t pay their credit card bills and they were put in a bucket list where they were counted as defaulters. The training usually considered as a honeymoon period and seriously it was. We made friends, we laughed, we played games and held competitions during training period and we enjoyed wholeheartedly. The worst part was yet to come in our way is to clear our mock calls and written test.

For me, everything was new. At that time I did not even know the definitions like what are team leaders, supervisors or the role of quality analyst. Voila! We cleared the mock calls and other tests even though they were not from real customers. We were yet to face real encounter with customers. First 2-3 calls, I could not even do the proper opening of the calls, but my seniors were there to help and guide me. The first week of our actual calling were discounted by taking only 20 to 30 calls. Slowly and gradually the number of calls increased.

The days were passing. I was sometimes snapped for taking bad calls. At that time, I was so nervous if my supervisor used to instruct me to do v lookup in the excel sheet. Slowly I learnt the professional lingo and the work. After a month’s hard work getting first salary of Rs. 3,000 was the happiest moment in my professional life.

Taking calls, making report in excel sheets and taking hasty lunch break with my colleague Sushma and others soon became a routine. And I sighed by knowing the fact that I was no longer a student but a working professional. My life drastically changed from gossipy, spicy, funny to being serious, focused, and hard-working. It’s not that I did not like my job but I wasn’t satisfied what I was doing. My heart ached whenever the reality hit to me that I wanted to write, write and write.

I enjoyed my working days at Malhir (company’s name). After 4 and half months I left the job as I aimed for higher salary and good position like a pro with an experience letter in my hand. Today I still become nostalgic about the time I spent there with my colleagues, now friends, especially Sushma (who is married with a kid).

At that time, there was no one to guide me or advice me about proper courses in media & advertising. My parents are not educated and my siblings were in the same position where I was.

Even a gap of 5 years is enough to change the current scenario that I am seeing today. Today’s digital era has made quite simpler for fresh graduates to apply. Who would have thought that you can get job opening information from Facebook group? Yes, it seems technology made the younger generation so interactive that while chatting with friends on Facebook he or she can still look for the job and apply it.

My advice for fresh graduates is for initial 1-2 years experiment and explore diverse fields and then go for the one you want to settle and see for lifetime. You won’t regret it!

“I’m sharing my first internship experience for the #MyInternTheory activity at BlogAdda in association with Intern Theory.”

Life, in between the lines

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Life, in between the lines!

Ever since Frank left her she was broken from inside but showed herself as strong as rock. Her family arranged a guy for her and she got married. She had a nice wedding and memories to imprint in a marriage album.

She made every effort to keep her husband happy. After one year of marriage, she gave a birth to twin daughters Melissa and Julie. Cathy tried to fit in a family picture as much as she could. She looked after her family, her husband, her daughters and everything.

One lazy afternoon while sitting in a rocking chair, a flashback appeared in front of her eyes. How frank decided to meet her one last time.

Flashback appeared to Cathy

When she reached there at the City garden he was already waiting there for her. She felt something was amiss and he broke the news that he did not want to keep the relation going. While she had tears in her eyes, he had a cold heart leaving her behind. She cried and tried to see him with her teary eyes until his image became blurred to her.

Today when she finds herself staring at the family photo she tries to define herself. What was she? A wife, a mother or a girlfriend? She couldn’t find any of the definitions fit in her life even after many years of life. She lost her definition while she gave definition to others.

After all, life lies in between the lines! 

You'll also enjoy my latest post on relationships! To read click here - This is how Whatsapp is killing your relationship 

You raise me up by Arjun Hemmady {Book Review}

You Raise me up 

Book details

Title – You raise me up

Author – Arjun Hemmady

Genre – Fiction

Publisher – Leadstart Publishing Pvt Ltd

No of pages – 363     

Main characters – Aalok Sharma, Isha, Priyanka and Tanvi

Other characters – Tanvi’s father Kishore, Mother Rohini, Sheetal – Isha’s husband

The plot

The story revolves around the lead character Aalok Sharma where he encounters beautiful and cheerful Priyanka Mehra on a flight from New Delhi to Mumbai. They quickly get hooked to each other despite of their opposite nature. After the first meeting on the flight destiny continues to meet them again and again in several occasions where their friendship flourishes. However, something is holding back Aalok. The question arises here whether his opposite nature concerns him or will he be able to conquer his demons from the past in order to pursue this girl?

My review

The title ‘Raise me up’ itself hinted me that the novel must be around hope and life. Guess what? I wasn’t wrong. Who wouldn’t want inspiration, moral support throughout the difficult times of his/her life? Certainly, the story has weaved around hope and life, fears and possibilities.

The main characters in the story are Aalok Sharma, his twin sister Isha, Tanvi and Priyanka, the two leading girls in his life. The life of Aalok Sharma is intertwined with his past and present. The first few chapters of the novel starts with introducing lady love Priyanka along with his overprotective twin sister, Isha. While his personal life progressing towards something, Isha is always there to protect and help him in whatever ways she could. I wanted to see how the story has justified the lesson by giving advice never to lose hope for current generation no matter how difficult times you’re stuck in through this love story.

As I read Aalok’s painful past, his past failures, his sister’s guidance throughout bad times; Tanvi’s father (Kishore) alcohol habit, and Tanvi’s little brother’s fight against cancer and Tanvi’s own troubled life with Aalok and his current relation with Priyanka, all these instances the author keep hammering us about the golden lesson of never giving up.

The attempt is nice; however, somewhere I felt the plot was losing its grip. For instance, the story never sheds a light on how Kishor manages to get rid of his alcohol habit or at least makes an attempt to reduce it. In first few chapters, the domestic abuse is shown in Tanvi’s house due to Kishor’s alcohol problem and the last few chapters the scene is quickly changed when Kishore is shown as mature and responsible father.

The climax

Whether it is just another love story or we learn something from this story I will leave that for the readers to decide.

Writing style

The narration is very simple to follow and the writing style is suitable for both young and adult audience. The characters such as Isha, Tanvi and Priyanka are involved well. In many places, the phrases have become repetitive.

What I liked?

The author has given several instances where he emphasizes about possibilities, destiny and keeping your hopes high. Certainly, the title suits to the theme of the story as the author have built characters like Isha, being a supportive sister and Priyanka, an understanding girlfriend.

The moral at the end of the story is that –

Always raise your hopes up when going through difficult times and see life in a positive view as you never know what possibilities come on your way. In short, every cloud has a silver lining.

My rating: 3.5/5

I would recommend this book to borrow inspiration despite some of the flaws.

About the author

Born on 5th April, 1989, Arjun Hemmady completed his schooling from St. Mary’s ICSE (Mazgaon) and College from RA Podar College of Commerce and Economics. He is pursuing his Chartered Accountancy from the Institute of Chartered Accountants of India (ICAI). It is his first novel published in association with Leadstart Publishing Pvt Ltd.

For more information about the book, you can visit its Facebook page.

This review is a part of the biggest Book Review Program for Indian Bloggers. Participate now to get free books!

Bombay Bloopers

P. S - This is a guest post.  

Bombay Bloopers

Then Bombay - Now Mumbai (City of dreams)

 

Bombay was never a strange city to me. Before moving in here for work in 2010, I had visited this place several times to meet my sister.

I started living with my sister’s family in Mumbai. My peers complained of rising auto prices and jam packed locals every day and I was empathetic enough to ponder on it on my 4 minute walk from home to office. While they were busy searching for brokers for rent and fighting with their room-mates over space /grocery bills and tasteless canteen food; I made important decisions ranging from what to eat for dinner: palak paneer or mutter paneer and how my new room would have pink curtains contrasting with the white walls.

The city of dreams truly lived up to its name for me.

I spent a good 2 years here and then was transferred to my hometown for an assignment where daddy’s princess had a rosy path to tread on.

Fast forward to 2014, it was time to move to Mumbai again and this time without my sister’s presence in the city.

The moment I landed in the city with my baggage, the city looked strange to me .As I dragged my luggage towards the taxi stand I kept pondering on how uncannily daunting it would be to survive by myself this time. 

On my way to my new apartment, the taxi halted at a signal. My thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the window. Though it was very hot outside, the curious and innocent eyes of the knocker compelled me to listen to what he had to say. A boy of around 8 years was demonstrating a drawing book. I said “I don't have kids to buy this for “.

Image Source - Google Search(thehindu.com

He promptly replied “You can draw, color and paint yourself. It’s always fun to try new things. Who knows you could be better at this than you think”.  Although impressed by his salesmanship, I did not buy the book but I couldn't keep my eyes off my newly found guru who had uttered the exact words of wisdom I needed then. My taxi moved ahead and so did I.

I was apprehensive of my new innings in the city but then I decided to give it a shot with an open and positive mind. 

It’s been two years of living all by myself now and I’d like to share some wisdom too.

Life is a journey. However small be, every journey has stories and every story has a moral. You either become wise by experiencing things or by learning from what others have experienced.

I've learnt about life in these 2 years more than my whole life put together.

Here's what I’d like to share with anyone who is apprehensive about doing a new thing:

You cannot be everywhere and you cannot do everything. So prioritize what is important. The thumb rule is to value people over things.

Always be ready with alternatives and backup plans.

Take into account everyone’s opinion. If you think a certain opinion is unimportant then let the person know why it is so.

Always support your statements with logic and facts. Don’t say or do anything on basis of any preconceived notion.

Bank on action plans and ideas and not people.

Be hungry for knowledge and have multiple perspectives and think about all possible outcomes of everything you say or do.

And finally no work or person is inconspicuous. There is plenty to learn from each kind of work and person.

About the guest blogger:

Namrata Shrivastava is a software engineer by profession and she says,"writing remains my timeless passion." She has many credits in her stride and currently she is on a long vacation with her husband in the UK. To know more about her, visit her awesome blog - "Life Har Angle Se!"

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